Born to Die

(Diary of a teenager 0707)


You said it is the game of lights. I could not get it out of my mind. I was so fascinated by flickering rhythmic lights that they made a mirror to the happiness in my life. The red color in which we sat for hours talking and cuddling, I could fill the warmth of your body like the steam of a freshly brewed coffee; irresistible and I craved for more.

We all are going to HELL!

From the diaries---

Today was a same day as every day. It’s just that I had to rush to station early because my uncle has to drop her wife to the airport. Oh well. I try to avoid locals as much as I can so I go daily to my office with uncle. It’s on his way so he drops me almost every day. So even if I need to get my ass off my bed in morning 7.30, which I normally do by 8 I managed somehow to do it. There I came to bus stop. Now this is the funny part. Every day I go to bus stop expecting to catch a bus like everybody else and save around 50 bucks daily but it seldom happens. I end up reserving a cab. Today I was standing at the bus stop waving my hand vertically- a gesture to halt cabs. There was standing a man, aged 60. He inquired me whether I am going to station. When I nodded he asked, ”Would you like to share a cab till station?” I was like cool, why not. Of course. No harm in being with an old person in the morning.

Zindagi- Life.

Today radio played every song on the word mentioned above, zindagi meaning life.

• Zindagi kaisi hai paheli haye
• Zindagi ke safar me gujar jate hai
• Zindagi pyaar ka geet hai isse har roz gana padega

Right now I could only recollect these three songs. There were one or two more.

I like to philosophise things. For me it’s all serendipity. Life gives you clues and hints to help you in making choices and taking decisions; you just have to be that smart enough to read these signals.

I had to do a lot of things before I die. The list is long and something or the other keeps on adding.

Random Stuff

Lovely date is today, 0707; the James bond date… Problem is with me that I have a lot to write on a lot of topics; they keep on pondering in my mind all the time but the moment I start to write I tend to forget and be as blank as a sky without stars.

It feels good, real good, when people say they missed you. You don’t know whether they did or not, you could never know, but the joy inside you, you know that  is real. It doesn’t matter whether it lasts for a couple of minutes or hours or days, it happens is what matters.

I have done things that I never thought I would ever do, although I wanted to do, but wasn’t sure I would have enough guts to pull myself from my walls that veiled me from the reality. I have done good things. I have done terrible things. The best part is I don’t have any regrets. I was shocked too.

You are not DEAD

You are kind of a broken star inside me

Burning and killing me when I am trying to live

The memories I cherished once is haunting me now

I wish you could come and save me, as you always did.

You are like twilight in the sky ready to bloom

Your thoughts are alive I wished you would have been too.

I can feel your breath, your presence around me

I wish we meet upfront, so that I could see.