Strangers

I know it would sound crazy but I like telling secrets to strangers. I like talking to them sharing every bit of my life. Because I know they would not judge me; how could they, they don’t even know me! Just a name for both of us is enough. I can go hours and hours talking, chatting, sharing!

Hence it is better to open up with someone you don't know. Either you become friends or the person just leaves. In both the cases you have nothing to lose. If you become good friends then you get someone who is accepting you with all the flaws you got. You again don't have to pretend to them or impress them in order to continue the friendship. I know you would think no one tries to impress their friends. But believe me, you do. There are a lot of things you don't disclose because you know the friend might not accept that the very fact about you and it might lead to weaken your so called 'friendship' and at last you just hide.

I am vulnerable. But strong enough not to allow anyone enter my weak zone. Yes I have been hurt. I have been hurt enough to deal with life. Enough to understand how people carry pretense. I know I can trust nobody; nobody I know. Cause they are going to mock at my secrets and fear my deepest dark side. I don't want to lose them. But strangers are people like you. At least you have option to pick from many. This world is full of them.

I love to love strangers. And happy to be friends with them.

The What-ifs of LIFE

College Diaries:
From a Journal of a Teenager #2

I know a guy with whom I have been friends with. And I really want to be more than friends. I like him. We can go hours talking. We share same taste in music and food. We both have been heart-broken. We both have moved on.

I know he also wants that.  But we both are afraid to confess because of the many what-ifs; what if our assumption is wrong! What if the other person denies! And the worst case- what if he does not feel the same way I do.

We suppressed our feelings because we might get hurt. But I want to confess. I want to say him that after a long time I finally found someone who thinks the same way I do. I feel alive with him. I like talking to him. I like listening to him more. I like the way he speaks so softly and slowly. I like the way he smiles. I want to be with him, at least meet him once. Go for a date. Talk about us, neither past nor future.

I want to show how stupid and crazy I am. I want to know how he would deal with my idiosyncrasies. I want him to confide in me. I love him and want him to love me more.

But I am afraid; afraid of rejection. Any one of us has to be brave to tell first.

 I hope I can. I wish he does.

Cya diary!

Everybody is so afraid to get hurt.It is like pain is ruling us. We fear it. 

Life is small and beautiful. Don’t let the what-ifs come in your way. There are millions of people out there. Why to get afraid of getting hurt from one? It might also be possible that your assumptions are true and the life would take a turn to a beautiful road. 

You never know. Take chances. Live the ‘only’ life you got in ‘your’ way. Don’t let any person or emotions govern you.

The World is Yours

Good and bad lies with you. Don't feel down.

I get frightened. I procrastinate. I doubt. But I Get up, break the black cloud. I Introspect. I Improve at least I try to.

I am not a good girl. I don’t want to be. I have seen the good to the bad! And vice-versa. World did not treat me right when i was good. Sometimes you have to be a bitch to make the world realize: you value! I am happy to be that bitch.

No one can take you for granted!

You don't have to be good to the world; to people who do not matter to you. First be good to yourself. Treat yourself well. Care for you. Believe in you.

I care for me. I love me. I am so much drowned in me that there is no place of loathing.

 Love yourself and trust in the potential you have. You  can do wonders, you don’t have to always do something productive, just keep yourself busy. Read, listen to music, write ideas, create ideas, think of ideas, ideas to reform the world, ideas to improve something, it might be crazy, don’t worry jot it down.

You have to believe that you can do it and the world is yours.

Don't hold Back

I was a cry baby. I still am. I don’t understand why the act of crying is so infamous. People consider it as a sign of weakness. And the most bullshit statement I have ever heard is boys don’t cry. Why? Are they not allowed to shed tears?

As you laugh so you cry. There is nothing wrong in it. No need to run away from it.

I like to cry. I like tears. I feel it is one of the best creations of God. You laugh to express your happiness; you cry to exfoliate your sadness. It is a good thing to do. You feel a sudden lift of weight from your chest.

Get rid of the demon that eats you up inside. Cry. Don't hold back. Shed those tears. They are meant to leave your eyes, roll down your cheeks and see the world. By holding it back you are going to hurt yourself more.

Tears and smiles are the two wheels of a scooter. You need both to run your life and more importantly to run smooth you need the wheels of same size. So give some respect to tears as well. Cry whenever you feel like. Accept happiness and sadness with open hands.

I cry. I cry whenever I feel like. I have given my tears liberty. They roll down whenever they want to. Sometimes, as you cannot stop abruptly while laughing; I cannot do that while crying. But I can control it. It is a part of life and I give it no less value. I don’t feel ashamed of it. It is not my weakness.

It is an act that shows I am true; true with my feelings and I am not afraid to show them. 

I Like...

I like the smell of the tee you wear.

I like to roam in the house wearing that when you are asleep.

I like to make coffee for you in the morning.

I like how you sip it from the mug while one of your eyes is half-closed.

I like the way how you pull me back to bed when I try to wake you up.

I like the way you tease me when I dress up.

I like when we talk for hours in vain

I like when we walk miles together in rain.

I like it when you try your best to help me cook.

I like your love for your games, sports and books.

I like when  you do not ask me to stop while I cry.

I like the way you kiss and hug  when my mind is awry.

I like the long drives we go for in the weekends.

I like the late night candle light dinner dates.

I like the way you caress my hair.

I like the rugged torn levis you wear.

I like the way you listen to me with patience.

I like when you don’t run away from my craziness.

I like the space you give me and trust me so much. 

I like the fact that you like and need me very much. 

I like your beauty; it’s divine.

I like when you say that you are mine.